


Screaming Color

by akaakeiji



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, And excited, Best Friends, Blue - Freeform, Colors, Cute, I Don't Even Know, I Love You, I Tried, I mean, I mean you know that they're there but it's just too malum, Love, M/M, Minor Luke Hemmings/Ashton Irwin, Red - Freeform, Sad Calum, Sad Michael, Soulmates, but - Freeform, i would read it, im so scared, im sorry, it's my first malum os, just because it's malum, malum is cute, otp, they are so sweet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-12
Updated: 2015-04-12
Packaged: 2018-03-22 14:27:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3732262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akaakeiji/pseuds/akaakeiji
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You meet your soulmate and maybe nothing happens, but when you start feeling the slightest thing for them, you'll be able to see a colour, and the more your fondness grows, the more colours you'll admire. But it gets even better when you kiss them for the first time. It's a revelation."  This was the base of everything.</p><p>or a soulmate au where you start seeing colors when you start falling for your soulmate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Screaming Color

**Author's Note:**

> hi guys!!! :)  
> im so glad to be back here!  
> i don't know if you know me but i promised you (actually, i promised myself) that i would write and post a malum one shot so here it is :)  
> ..enjoy?

**SCREAMING COLOR**

Michael saw for the first time a colour when he was ten.

One moment everything was black and white, but suddenly something changed.

He was playing with Calum in his bedroom when they were supposed to study history together. The elder boy risked falling from his bed, his loyal best friend managed to catch him and they laughed together and Michael couldn't stop grinning and staring at the new light in Calum's eyes.

He used to identify every single shade between black and white, because even though they said the world had only those two, they could mix together and create new shadows and new lights, giving him the illusion that nothing was the same as something else. He could live happily without colours, he thought.

This was before that day, because when Calum went home that evening and Michael walked downstairs to have dinner, everything was _powerful_ and strong and brighter and beautiful and he could see only _one_ stupid colour. So, yes, maybe he wanted to see every chromatic combination that the earth showed people.

Then, during that meaningful day, he found out that the name of the colour was simple but pretty, it was 'red'. His mother told him, when he grabbed an amazing apple that wasn't dark grey anymore, but bright and shining. He looked at it in awe and his mum just understood, with worried and thoughtful eyes.

But a year later - he kept seeing only red, black, white and grey - his parents did 'the speech' and he was ashamed of himself because he didn't know what they were talking about. They said words such as 'love' that was about 'girls and boys' and 'one day you will see her again'.

"You meet your soulmate and maybe nothing happens, but when you start feeling the slightest thing for them, you'll be able to see a colour, and the more your fondness grows, the more colours you'll admire. But it gets even better when you kiss them for the first time. It's a revelation." This was the base of everything. The earth only showed people in love all its colours.

-

Blue. Calum's first colour was blue.

It started the way the sky changes. From a slight light blue to the darkest of the blues.

He thought it was weird when the white of his sheets was no more white, but a strange kind of grey, but not even grey.

He was fifteen and, seriously, he could swore to everyone that he hadn't got a clue about his soulmate, who he was and when he started to fall in love with him. Because yes, his soulmate was a _him_. And maybe Calum wasn't really clueless about this boy.

Only one person could mess with his feelings: his best friend. Mike could make him feel bad, happy, sad and full with a fingers snap. He had known him for ages and they had always been close to each other as two brothers. But as the years passed by, Calum's sensations changed.

It began with his smile and his lips. They were strumming chords and Michael had trouble playing a solo, but when he did it his grin was the sweetest thing Calum had ever seen.

The boy knew that his thoughts about him were wrong, but once it started with that smile, things kept getting worse. Everything that Michael did was snowflakes that continued to cling to a snowball, letting it get bigger.

Actually, he was quite screwed. He didn't know for a fact, but he was sure that Michael liked girls. At least, the older boy acted that way.

What was wrong with the entire system was the rejection. You could be in love with someone, but you could be in love with someone who loves somebody else.

He didn't want to live in a world that had just one real colour, where he could see a beautiful blue sky holding a flat grey circle called sun, but most of all he didn't want to live without Michael. He wanted to see pink, red, yellow, brown, all the colours his parents used to name and he wanted his best friend's love.

His mother told him that his eyes were brown, that he had a tanned complexion (he had no idea what it meant) and that Michael's eyes were a pretty green colour. Calum thought already that they were big and beautiful, but when something changed there, when he began to see different shades he even began to think that green could be his favourite unknown colour.

Time went by and he grew up, gradually developing the ability to see each type of blue, wrongly falling for his best friend with his soft full lips and cute smile, by degrees.

-

Michael was a mess.

When he turned sixteen he was able to see almost every colour, thanks to his soulmate. His soulmate that happened to be his best friend, his brother, his _everything_. Maybe that's why he had fallen for him.

At first he didn't accept it. For years he had kept seeing just red and he was fine, because he didn't have to worry about love, such a foolish thing he couldn't even understand.

And for years he had kept everything as a secret. Everyone in school saw black and white. Calum saw black and white, Luke saw black and white. Why did he have to be the weirdo, then? So he just didn't say a word about it and everything in his life was messy because of those obnoxious colours.

He would find himself calling something by their colour and stuttering awkwardly in the attempt to explain. "My mum told me sunflowers are yellow, you idiot." He said once and Calum just nodded, giggling. That silly laugh, that stupid sound was something that Michael loved and he hated himself for this, because he had no idea what love was really about and how to fix the untidiness in his mind.

He didn't know how he had gotten stuck in that situation.

First of all, he was sure he liked girls but then Calum was a complete different thing.

Second, Calum's eyes kept changing and the more their colour gained brightness and warmness, the more Michael loved them, and that made him see other colours which joined the ones in those eyes and it was an annoying endless cycle.

Third, he was jealous and the problem was Luke. At first he had hated that kid, he just couldn't stand him. But then they became friends and they started playing guitar together and singing together and their band was made.

Nevertheless, every time he glanced at them, at the way Calum seemed to be almost more comfortable around the blonde boy than he did around him, he felt that burning sensation and the horrible will to grab Calum's attention. So he acted like a jerk, making jokes about the two of them, teasing Calum so bad that he would get grumpy or, even worse, cold. Michael hated coldness. He hated it because his best friend was the warmest, cuddliest, most loving person he knew and drying his emotions only upset the older boy.

What Michael was yet to know was that this kind of jealousy, the unhappiness, the powerlessness he felt were _love_ consequences.

And love brought colours.

And colours brought trouble.

-

Calum was sixteen and the only thing he could think was "Fuck". He kept falling in love with his best friend more, deeper, riskier.

He could see green now and it really was his favorite colour. His best friend's eyes were stunning.

Apparently, Michael didn't know colours yet, which meant that he hadn't fallen in love yet, something that made Calum feel egoistically serene. Although he wanted to keep his skill as a secret, Michael managed to find out about it one day.

They were just relaxing on the beach with Luke and Ashton, the good new drummer of their band, who was talking about a girl next to them. Calum was just carelessly listening, wondering about something else, somebody else, but when Ashton said "Mike! She is looking at you!", he turned and noticed the sheepish look on his best friend's face.

Suddenly he saw _red_. He knew it was red because that was the basic colour left. So with blue, green and red, their combinations caused an implosion inside Calum's head. The first thing he saw was Michael's cheeks, because they seemed to be burning and it was lovely. Then he glanced at Ashton's t-shirt and frowned.

"Dude that's the shirt you were wearing the day of our first band practice, isn't it?" And it was obscene. Really, it was painful for his eyes.

"Yeah, why?" The curly haired boy rose his eyebrows and Calum just shrugged at that.

"You said you can't see all colours, right? Can you see the one of your shirt?" He was trying to be superficial.

"Of course, it's purple. Why?"

 _Purple_. Calum registered the information and shrugged again. "Just wondering, you know." And the older boy just nodded.

But after that, Michael went closer to him, whispering "You see colours, don't you?" with hands on his hips and irremovable look, one thing that Calum couldn't ignore.

He was just too close to him, too hot, too handsome, too his best friend, just too _Michael_. Sometimes he wondered if he was really falling in love with him or if everything was just a consequence of hormones and puberty. But then he would see colours and yes, he was quite in love.

"Maybe?" He answered. And Michael just nodded. He didn't say "who?", he didn't jump with joy, he just nodded. And perhaps Calum was hurt, because wasn't that boy his best friend? He was supposed to be happy, excited, _something_.

"Why are you so quiet?" Calum's face was burning under the sun and so was the temptation to tell him everything.

"What do you want me to say?" And that hurt, too. His tone was emotionless and disinterested.

"I don't know? Something like 'I'm glad that you are falling in love?'"

Michael was staring at the sunset, not facing the tanned boy, but suddenly he turned. "Of course I am!"

"So what's going on?"

And Michael shrugged, slightly closing his lips in a little wonderful smile, changing the atmosphere, even the world mood. "Maybe I'm just jealous because you can see our surroundings for what they really are."

Calum smiled but didn't believe him, though. He knew him too well to do that, because when Michael was jealous he acted like an idiot, when he was thoughtful he didn't speak.

But that smile was everything that Calum needed. It was sweet and comforting and it made him feel like he was safe and sound, as if everything wasn't supposed to crash down at some point.

-

Calum was in love.

Michael was broken.

Calum was in love with a tall blonde boy, with pretty blue eyes, disgustingly cute smile, broad shoulders and a lip ring. A stupid, sexy lip ring. Of course he was in love with him, of course he was in love with Luke.

Michael was broken, because he hated colours. The fact that he could see every colour now - maybe not each shade, maybe a little bit blurry - reminded him of Calum. He would walk on the streets, maybe thinking about nothing. He would notice something pretty, something colourful, and Calum's smile would show up in his mind.

Between them now there was something, a distance, a wall, emptiness. Calum got closer to Luke, and what was left for Michael was Ashton's affection.

It sucked.

Of course, Luke and Ashton were his best friends, too, but Calum was his soulmate. He missed his soulmate. He missed walking everywhere with Calum, laughing and joking. He missed his hugs, when he put his arms around Michael's shoulders and laid his head on the boy's neck, or when they were sitting on the couch and he cuddled against him. He missed the way they used to brush their shoulders without awkwardness.

Although Michael met him everyday, he just missed him.

They still played together with the band, joking with the band, eating with the band, but there weren't Michael and Calum's moments anymore. He never talked about colours, love, Luke, soulmates. He knew he was supposed to do that, but words such as "Man, I'm so happy you're in love", or "I'm sure you and Luke will be so cute together" felt wrong like a clown holding a yellow balloon during a funeral. He didn't want to lie, and even if he wanted to, he just couldn't.

So they kept that sort of weird emotional distance.

But Michael's colours didn't fade a bit.

He was sad, he was jealous, he was moody and stressed.

But he saw colours, anyway.

He loved Calum, anyway.

-

Calum began to imagine his life without Michael.

Calum began to cry doing that.

He was miserable, he was embarrassed of himself, but he couldn't help it. He was going to live without the love of his life and lose his best friend all at once. He didn't know what to do, what to say.

If Michael didn't see colours, he wasn't in love yet, so why did Calum have to tell him he loved him and make him feel guilty for not having mutual feelings? The younger boy knew that he would feel guilty and didn't want to provoke that.

But he missed his soulmate, the boy who kept dyeing his hair with colours he couldn't even see, the boy that could change Calum's mood with a gesture, a grin, a giggle. He just loved him so much. How could he live without those green eyes?

Once he was chatting with Luke on the couch, because the blonde boy felt that something was wrong. Calum felt sick and the reason was that he had started to appreciate his friend's presence, but it was just a way to fill Michael's absence - and it was horrible. But Luke was a great friend and he let him be silent, cuddling him in a soothing way. And Calum melted inside his embrace, because it was everything left. Michael entered the room that day and looked at them like they were his public enemies, like he was shocked and disgusted by them, or maybe like he was disappointed about something. And after grabbing a bottle of water, he left.

And Calum couldn't even cry properly.

He just stood frozen, with a rock in his throat that didn't want to move, with hard breaths and fast heartbeats. Luke held him tighter, as he might be understanding him. Calum had to appreciate each kind of affection. He had to get used to someone else, slowly, difficultly.

But after all, he couldn't really lose Michael, because he saw him playing his guitar everyday, making terrible jokes, smiling while singing, hugging Ashton instead of him.

It was _damaging_ , it was _pain_ , but it wasn't empty room in his stomach. He knew that suffering was inevitable, but he preferred to suffer with his soulmate in his life, even if it was just a tiny smile a day, a brief eye contact, a polite "How are you?". Probably it was unhealthy, but it eased the ache.

-

Michael wanted to scream. He wanted to stop denying and tell Calum everything he had always felt, kept inside himself, burning his lungs, consuming him from the interior. He loved him in every way possible.

He had enough of faking feelings or interpreting something as 'pure friendly affection'. He didn't want to hug Calum like a friend - or like a best friend - but he wanted to do it like a lover, touch him like a friend couldn't, kiss him like Calum probably wanted to kiss Luke.

And Calum had to know that.

But then the blonde boy began to see colours and everything just crumbled down.

Michael didn't know why they had never talked about it, but none in the band used to say a word about colours and love and soulmates. The only one who had an official soulmate was Ashton.

Michael understood that Luke saw colours when the boy looked at him and noticed his dyed red hair. The expression he made didn't lie, he was impressed, shocked and fascinated.

And Michael had a breakdown. Calum's love was reciprocated. They were going to be a couple, they were going to be together under Michael's eyes, they were going to kiss each other, touch each other. And the boy couldn't stop that. If they belonged together, he had to accept it and put himself aside. His everything's happiness came first.

He felt awful, anyway. The picture of the one he loved with someone else was ruining his life. He was always sad, isolated, always trying to disguise himself as a happy boy. He managed to do that, to pretend.

He acted normally with Luke - who was keeping the secret, too - and more than normally with Calum, maybe trying to get closer again, to show him his love again.

However it didn't help, because being close to Calum made him want more and more. There were nights when he dreamt about kissing Calum, touching his soft full lips, holding him tight, but then there would be Luke instead of Michael and he woke up, sweaty and heartbroken, trembling and afraid to go back to sleep.

Nevertheless, at least he was taking Calum back as a best friend. He would sit on the couch more sorrowed than ever, but he would cuddle against him, maybe laying his head on the boy's lap, while his inner feelings for his friend were choking him to death.

-

Michael saw colours and Calum was going mad.

He didn't know who his soulmate was, where that happened, why he didn't say anything and why all seemed to be weirdly normal. Everything around Calum was apparently perfect, but he knew that there was something hiding behind the corner, ready to attack the new sweet routine - Mike and Cal together again.

However, hide and seek has rules and there's a point when the game ends.

Calum was alone at home, where the entire band lived, listening to his iPod, making himself sad and nostalgic. He started to think about his life, about how much he loved his job, the band, how much he loved Michael. Nothing made sense, because he should have run from him when he had the chance and now he was stuck, hating the fact that he loved it. He melted under illusion and nice hugs.

Michael was in love with someone and he was going to lose him.

He put his arms around his knees, pulling them against his chest and slipped his fingers into the holes of his black jeans, brooding and shaking, panting and struggling. He pressed his forehead against his legs and closed his eyes, until he heard a voice.

"Cal?" He raised his head, looking up like he was facing the light for the first time in his life. Michael stood up in front of the kitchen door, holding a bag of a games store, with worried eyes, those astonishing green wells full of concern and sadness. The boy with red hair just rushed and jumped next to him, covering the ball Calum had created. The tanned boy crashed. It was stupid, but that moment reminded him of those waves that waited an eternity just to smash against rocks with noise and spurting water.

He held on to Michael's shirt, thinking "Please don't go, please leave me, please love me.", scenting his clothes perfume, hoping the world could end right there. "What's happened, Cal? Please tell me." Although the boy's voice was whining, Calum didn't speak, strengthening his grip on him. "Calum please, why are you crying? You are a wreck, it hurts me."

And if Michael was hurt, he had to fix it. "Don't worry, it's just a moment. I'll be fine." He even tried to smile, but the other boy pretended not to notice the fiction.

"I want to know. I want to know what happens to you because you are my best friend and I'm not willing to lose you like I was going to before. Please. Talk." For the first time he admitted that they had been close to be deprived of each other.

And Calum took a breath. "There's this boy, you know.."

"Calum, you see colours, I know you're in love.." Even if he smiled, Calum asked himself why he looked unhappy.

"Yeah but now he sees colours too and I know that it's not me that he loves." _Wow_ , Calum had never shocked someone like that before. Michael's face was everything and nothing, it seemed a mixture of joy and jealousy, of fear and hope.

"How do you know that he sees colours?" Michael raised his eyebrows and Calum wanted to punch him for being him.

"I watched him a lot lately and he seems to recognize them." Michael was thinking and Calum was perplex, but he was calm now. Letting words out in his best friend's arms helped him a little.

"And how do you know he doesn't love you?"

Calum shrugged, talking about Michael when he didn't even know, like those guys that said 'You know, I've got this friend'. "I think he loves a girl or whatever, I don't know." And they stayed silent for a while, holding each other with synchronized breaths.

"I'd slap him." His voice was deep and strong and just beautiful. 

Calum laughed harshly, wiping some tears away with his hands."You wouldn't."

"Why? Because 'my name is Luke Hemmings and I've got wonderful blue eyes and sexiness included in the price'?"

"Luke?" _Wait_. What did he say?

"It's obviously Luke. I think everybody knows that." And the boy looked like he was firmly sure about what he was saying.

"I'm not in love with Luke."

"Oh." And a silence came, seeming to be endless. Calum felt lighter, though, and he was being naive again, basking in Michael's heat. "Wow."

Calum moved to look at his face, which was thoughtful. "What?" The boy's prospect was hard to ignore for him, since he could enjoy Michael's cheek and jaw, the edges of his lips and nose, even his eyelids blinking.

"I really thought you loved him. Like, who, then? I mean, I know everyone that you know and it doesn't look like you're in love with somebody else."

The tanned boy was petrified. He couldn't tell him a lie, he deserved the truth. But he deserved happiness, too. What did he have to do? "You see colours, too, don't you?" He answered with another question, the best idea of the entire existence.

Michael swallowed and his best friend gazed at his Adam apple going down, just to avoid his look. "We are not talking about me."

Calum sighed, because hiding such an awesome thing like love didn't make sense. "Just-"

"Yes."

"When did it start?"

"When I was ten."

And that surprised Calum like the first storm of winter. "Ten?! And you've never told me! You have always lied to me!" He was not mad, not really. He utterly understood him, he tried to do that himself.

"You've never asked me." The boy shrugged as love didn't matter to him.

"You have loved someone for years and I didn't realize, I'm an idiot." And Michael did something that hurt the younger boy. He burst away from him and stood up in front of the couch.

Calum was ripped from warmness and safety and he began to think that time for hide and seek was running out.

"I have loved you for years and you didn't realize."

Calum blinked. "W-what?" And he closed and opened his eyes over again, trying to wake up.

"I was so scared at first and I've seen only red for years! I thought I could control that but then I was jealous of Luke and your eyes are so fucking impressive, like. Oh my God. Cal, every time I could see new colors in there and I was terrified." He took a breath and closed his lips, waiting, looking at Calum, who was dreaming, of course. How could that happen in real life?

"You.. you love me? But.. but.." The other one interrupted him with a gesture. "Listen. I know you have a soulmate and I'm sure that whoever he is he doesn't love someone else. The fact that I love you can't change me and you. Please, don't change because of that, I need my best friend, I need you." He cried.

Calum was trembling, still on the couch, looking up at him. "I know he loves me now, he has just said it." He stood up, going closer to his best friend.

Michael's body stiffened, but Calum smiled. He didn't talk because their looks were speaking for them, shaking and meeting each other's shades.

Green was saying "I'm scared.", but brown was responding "We'll be safe."

And the earth began to explode for them. Their lips connected and even if their eyes were close they could _feel_ colours around them, burning and shining, completing one another.

Michael's mouth was so right for him, their lips fit perfectly and their hands synchronized and intertwined together automatically.

Everything was so clear now that both of them were damning themselves, because they had been blind for so long, frightened of their own colours.

When Michael pulled back to breathe, Calum opened his eyes. The world was different. He was staring at the same things, the same colours, but they were so powerful and strong that he wondered if he had ever seen colours for real.

But there was something more pleasant to admire.

He turned to look into Michael's eyes. "I love you, too." He grinned and his soulmate mimicked him, maybe a little reluctant, maybe still too amazed.

But then he didn't hesitate to kiss Calum again, every nightmare and fear slowly leaving them forever.

_Olly Olly oxen free._

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading!  
> id really appreciate comments and kudos, they give me life, seriously. but if you like it and don't say anything, i love you anyway :)  
> also, english is not my first languange, so if you find something wrong (im sure you will lol) just let me know? 
> 
> i think im done now. 
> 
> everything I post is completely dedicated to Jessica, because idek i love her and she deserves all the nice things. 
> 
> also, if you want to talk to me or comment or whatever, here's my tumblr [[x](http://malumtrashy.tumblr.com)]


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